Not everyone enjoys care-free school days, for some children, their entire schooling experience can be plagued with adversity and conflict. For many, classrooms and school corridors can resemble an active war zone where they become accustomed to daily slurs and the threat of physical abuse. That self-loathing is the defining marker of someone who has been bullied. It is extremely damaging and can lead to addiction and depression.
Added to this, they are often insecure about themselves. All too often, the targets are often much kinder people than bullies. It is estimated that approximately 10pcpc of any given group of children repeatedly bully others while approximately 10pcpc of children are repeatedly targeted by bullies.
Assuring the child that they are going to solve the problem immediately is misleading because it will take time. There will be problems when we try to fix it. They cannot see everything. Everyone needs to involve themselves. Recognising if your child is vulnerable is key to protecting them from being victimised, adds the expert. Ask the teachers in the school who these children are.
Simple things like joining the parent committee and initiating anti-bullying programmes can also be hugely effective. It can also be helpful to chat with an aunt or someone who has known your child for a long time, so that they can add an objective perspective. This means that your child needs to open up about their online activities, so that you can help them explore the dynamics. For mum-of-one Sarah Tyrrell, her school days were blighted with emotional and psychological abuse which was so extreme, she contemplated suicide. It sounds innocent enough, but year-old me was mortified. I was fat, and to me, that meant worthless.
I felt like it was my own fault for being fat.
Throughout my 20s, the little self-worth I did have diminished more and more. Eventually, around Christmas , I started to have suicidal thoughts, believing that the people I loved would be better off without me, including my five-year-old daughter. That was 18 months ago.
The body-positive advocate set up her website sarahtyrrell. I found that touching. After all, why does being fat make anyone any less deserving of basic respect? I want her to know that her value as a human being is completely unrelated to what she looks like, no matter what anyone says.
The summer holidays have finally started. I can't wait till this time next year because it will mean I'm done with primary school. Not that school is bad, it's not, I like my friends and the work is okay, it just means I'll be getting longer holidays.
Dave Bartholomew, who has died aged , was a New Orleans musician whose skills as a songwriter, arranger and bandleader helped usher in the era of rock 'n' roll. Just relax, nothing will go wrong. A bully often surrounds himself with a group of peers. He consciously picks weaker, more vulnerable victims, and repeatedly bothers the same people. In dealing with a bully, teach your child that posture, voice and eye contact are important.
These telegraph messages about whether you are vulnerable. The first imperative is to stop looking the other way. As long as we ignore dysfunctional behavior, we are giving it the green light to continue. The second step is to recognize that adults must take charge to stop it. Kids can't do it on their own. They often don't talk about it with adults because they're ashamed, embarrassed, or are afraid the adults will only make it worse.
But deep down, they want to talk about it.
They need to know that every adult at school will listen to them and help if they report a problem with bullying. Here are four practical steps teachers can take to address the problem of bullying in their classroom:. Some children adopt bullying behavior to help mask their own feelings of inadequacy. They may be learning disabled or for various reasons failing scholastically or socially, and are desperate to win respect from their peers. A bully may lack good adult role models. If he sees parents bullying him or each other, he may regard this type of behavior as the proper way to act.
In the end, most bullies wind up on the losing end. If they continue acting mean and hurtful, sooner or later they find themselves with very few friends left — usually other kids who are just like them. The power they wanted slips away fast. School authorities marginalize them. Other kids move on and leave bullies behind, dismissing them as troublemaking losers. Bullies can change if they absorb the fact that their behavior is not only wrong but destructive to themselves, and if they are willing to learn to use their power in positive ways.
Of course, some bullies never learn. But others respond to social skills training, remediation, "tough love" and positive role-modeling. Gradually they turn into cooperative and likable kids who grow up to become responsible, ethical and productive members of the community.
Just read of a school where not just bullying by serious physical and other abuse went on in bathrooms. As usual teachers and administration pretended not to know about it.
Its like the well-known movie producer, virtually everyone in his organization knew what was going on but others were told of the company's strict policies protecting women. Ignoring the bullies does not work, as they will only get more agitated. Bullying needs to be treated like the crime that it is. Yes, I said crime. If a stranger on the street tried to take your wallet, that person can get into legal trouble.
Bullying in its many forms is no less a crime than mugging or domestic violence. The bully must be dealt with quickly and swiftly. Will the bully need to seek out therapy? However, we can no longer afford to make excuses for this type of behavior. If this means that parents need to bring their attorney into the mix, then so be it. I too am an expert on bullying, too bad from personal experiences.
This article is a life saver as the information in it is right on the mark! I used to be quiet and bookish all the way to Grade 10 in school and was a target of taunting because of that and because I am tall and overweight.
I want her to know that her value as a human being is completely unrelated to what she looks like, no matter what anyone says. Biff Tannen Thomas F. What's involved? Here again, parents are influential. The police have interviewed six of the bullies, ages 13 to After all, meanness among friends isn't the same as bullying, she told herself.
HItting back physically will be unacceptable but answering back and speaking for oneself helps.